-Play your own music and get into it every time you play it. When you look bored, we're 10x as bored.
-Never do "shout outs". Your band sucks enough, don't slap your douchebag personality on top of the torture.
-When opening for a big headliner, keep your set short and simple. That idea you had of playing every song hoping someone will be into at least one or two? No bueno.
-Don't call your band metal unless you're in a metal band. Just because that bald dude from Disturbed would be into it does not make it metal.
-If you play slap bass I'm breaking your fingers.
-If you're playing a local show for your friends and your throwin out water bottles like there are 20,000 thirsty fans or you're spitting in the crowd you're going to get your face split wide the fuck open.
-Drummers with gloves are stupid.
-Unless you're an immortal music legend, don't fucking yell at the crowd to bring you a drink. Play your set and get it over with. We're the ones who needs the drink.
-If you use a cordless microphone you better be in a Vanilla Ice cover band or be prepared to have beer bottles chucked at your head.
-Heckle the hecklers. You don't go into their Burger King job and heckle them, so why are they heckling you at yours?
-If you are putting more time into your outfit and or hair you should probably spend less time on stage. In fact, spend 0 time on stage. Stay at home with your ego and skinny jeans.
-Hair spinning is only allowed if your name is Beavis or Butthead. Knock it off morons.
Plan on going to a show? Don't leave the house without checking off at least every single one of these essentials:
-Stop texting!! You're at a show retard.
-Wearing a shirt of the band you're there to see. We know you're into them dude, you're at the fuckin show.
-Shouting out requests like they're your personal juke box is embarrassing to your whole city. Go home and don't come out until you're not a faggot.
-The merch guy is not your friend. He's hesitant to sell you a shirt because he knows you're going to embarrass the band. He's only talking to you because he thinks your girlfriend is hot.
-Sweaty fat dudes who take their shirts off? Come oonnnnnnn!!
-No one wants to see that 40 second video clip from your phone that you can't make out. And put your arms down asshole, your elbows in my eye.
-Yelling "free bird" is usually always funny.
-If you run up for some lousy ass autograph while the bands half asleep, hauling their own gear in their van and you don't at least offer to help them - your balls are coming off. The band wants to pack up, go to slee, and get out of your farm town. You're blowin it!
-Don't start fights. Take that shit to a gay bar.
-Having conversations during the entire show is one hell of an expensive hang out for you and one lousy fucking show for me. Eat a gun
-Hey! Tall dude in the front! Fuck you.
-If the mic gets handed to you and you don't know the words, pass the mic. Don't just scream and moan like a retard. Pass it to someone who came to the show for the band, not scene points.
-Novak